Sometimes it is hard to remember that it truly is the small things that matter, particularly when you feel like all the big things are falling apart. Today I am having a particularly hard time with this – but I know it will pass, and then I will struggle it again. Sometimes all things, big and small, feel like they are colliding, like you are alone, like your wishes and dreams don’t matter, your feelings and thoughts are insignificant and you find yourself in a tad bit of a pity party.
I think the main plague in my life today is my job. I work for an extremely unorganized, uncaring organization and a boss that completely disrespects me and this finds me letting a lot of toxicity enter my life. I don’t really have much of a support network, so while I know the right thing to do to get me back to me is to leave this wasteland behind – but how to I do that? How does one leave what they’ve got, but don’t want, yet need it to survive (read pay bills, eat etc). How does one throw it all up in the air, give life a shuffle and pray that you meet your complete happiness? How do you plan a better path when you are too busy sinking mud where you got stuck off-roading ?
I do appreciate the small things – but sometimes the bigger things consume you – like a tidal wave. No time to re-engerize, no other cheerleader on the sidelines. Time to dust off the Pom-poms!!